Nights like these sometimes makes you want to kill yourself.
They make you want to scream and toss, an endless never resting movement.
Forcing insomnia to sink into your skin and make you itch.
Scratching until the blood gets under your fingernails.
One side, to the other, same walls all around.
You know those nights where you have your eyes closed and thoughts just seep in.
The nights when you wonder what is your purpose in life. What actions are you taking to fulfill it and define who you are.
Life is so fragile and you could be dead in a second. Being on this earth is a privilege, to see and experience everything exactly how it was placed, because there is a true beauty to it that only privileged eyes can see. There are those nights where you just feel like you don’t deserve to have that privilege mother earth has given to you because all you can think is “Why me? What great have I done?”
And you put yourself in the middle, hold your life in your hands, and everything you were is now nothing. Slowly you fade from the minds of others because everyone you knew is now forgetting or departing as well from the earth, becoming only a painful memory of why?
Life, it’s a fragile thing isn’t it?
You know those late nights, where you just want to kill yourself, just to make sure you’re were alive, that everything you had seen, the sins, the good, the evil, the beauty, everything. That it was real and you lived it all.
Finally blogged haha!