Hello 2012

Greetings and salutations to the new year. Hurrah for 2012 I have done it! 365 days without dying. A New year, it offers people a chance to “erase” everything from the past and start the new year with a clean fresh start. Unfortunately for me, I think I would do anything to go back now. I will be honest, I did not intend to spend my last minutes of  2011 huddled over a trash can, vomiting on my boyfriend. OH the shame. One thing I knew though, I was not myself, and I know they say its wrong to hate yourself, but I think I can be the judge of that. I was seeking for that feeling of blank, that ‘not giving a shit’, I suppose after going through some down days, a little of this and that wouldn’t feel   like anything but sanctuary. I knew it wouldn’t do anything, drinking the night away won’t make anything go away.
Mortified and scarred for what now the 2012 has to offer for me, a college acceptance letter? A new outlook on life, honestly after surviving from last night, I think I will be prepared for anything. Yea… Sounds corny I get it. So, for the next holidays and events I have made a mental check list to keep in mind.

  • When you feel like your about to drop, please just STOP don’t roll.
  • Slow the fuck down… It is not a race.
  • Don’t listen to LMFAO before hand… Or really any kind of party hard songs…
  • If you dress all pretty with make up and all, try to leave like that.
  • Do not make friends with the floor and walls.
  • Don’t mix so much, treat it like when you do your laundry.
  • Keep in mind: you’re not one of the guys, you are a woman.
  • Have class, please! Please! Please!
  • Don’t get so “aggressive” it’s not sexy.
  • Listen to the person saying “I think you’ve had enough” <— IMPORTANT

Anyway… Over all I think It was a decent year, a lot changed I suppose but thats what time does after a while. We grow up, make mistakes, cry, smile. We live, I suppose that is the beauty about it. Reflection: I could retrace every memory and diary entry I have to tell you the ups and downs of my year, I am sure many have done that by now. Or go into detail how I will be very determined to accomplish my resolution goal, which by the way are always a fail. They are stupid, I mean the ideas are great, but instead of telling everyone or posting it up on your social network, why not actually go forward and show it? And when it is done you can proudly just say “It was my goal, and I did it!”
Hello 2012, I can’t wait to see what the year has to offer, I figured that if I keep an optimistic outlook, then it will be like that (I hope).

So lets raise our glasses (non-alcohol please) and toast to the new year! Cheers to the new and improved better us? Right. Changes, they can be friendly.

LETS GO 2012!
Hello 2012

Send ME to the asylum.

I am going crazy. Apperently  there is a death at the school grounds. People are annoying and stupid, and I am stuck between two football players talking non chalantly about “getting that ass” and “partys” ( yea good luck getting through life guys). And a girl who doesn’t stop staring… STOP STARING! it is rude.  I am suppose to be doing work but eff it. I am done for the day I have honors orchestra later on with a puppy. And correction, I am at a table with three idiots. Well 2 and 1/2.  There is not much I can say. Oh concert maybe? I would like to go to. I don’t think this would do well if it gets posted up on Facebook… Fuck it. I have freedom of expression right? did i really just get asked what an Asylum was?…

I quit…

ahh human rights class has done me well.

Ranting, complaining, sorry it is a tuesday. They are the worst. So weekend is comming up I am SO excited. Seeing family friends, my old friend (him and I have been friends since kinder). I think last time I saw him was about 4 years ago (only remember because I was still going through that “emo” stage). SO much food to go around as well!! bahh im salivating  just thinking about that chicken and rice.

I am trailing off to quickly.

I have horrible writers block and right now a long long LONG nap would be wonderful. A nap with you, that would be even better.

I am so excited in Orchestra we are playing themes from alice in wonderland (the tim Burton) composed by Danny Elfman. Anyways, I am done. FINISHED. Good bye.

Send ME to the asylum.